salamandher | 18th - Audio

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18th - Audio

Oh weh, weh, we're human.

That's what you expected, right?

[And yet, she sounds downright cheerful about the whole thing.]

Bitches don't know how good you've got it. Suck it up. Blah blah, there's your motivational speech or some shit.

[... she might also be a little... tipsy. For the first time in her entire goddamn life.]

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Eloquent as always.

[he sounds less crazy at least!]

Are you drunk, Kara?

Damn right.

... Maybe. Maybe just a bit.

Yes. Good. As --

Am I.

[Booze calmed the crazy down. Who knew.]

I'm happy for you?

Yes. Yes. You too.

[Does that make sense NOPE.]

Me too what now?

Er...

[Shrug.]

Alcohol?

Yeah... sounds about right.

How drunk are you?

Incredibly.

[He sounds muuuuuch better than before.]

It...slows down motor functions. I'm feeling much better now.

Edited 2012-08-17 03:40 (UTC)

Well, yeah, that's... kind of the point of the whole thing.

Whole drinking thing.

Haaaa. Is it, then? It's -- rare. For me. I don't drunk much. Drink much.

[Whatever.]

Clearly.

And here, I don't drink at all. The hell am I more sober than you?

I am--

[hiccup]

Not completely certain!

... Clearly.

You too?

[Why is everyone he knows getting drunk?]

Me too what?

It seems like everyone wants to get drunk all of the sudden.

Mmmmmmmmaybe because some of us can't.

You can't get drunk?

[Because she seems pretty drunk right now?]

Nope.

It all... burns. Alcohol burns. Really good.

Oh. Oh.

[Right the whole burning thing.]

Yeah I can see how that wouldn't go well.

Goes about as well as a lighter in... wherever it is they make... booze.

Okay, but even if you can drink it now isn't that still kind of risky. I mean you could accidentally turn yourself into a time bomb.

Naaaah, it doesn't work like that. Nope.

I really hope not.

[He'll just keep his fingers crossed anyway.]

Welp, for some people who've never been human it's kinda a shock.

Never been.

Not shocked.

Drinkin'.

That's one way to deal with it.

Sure is!

Just don't drink too much.

Can't. If I do, it's all gonna burn.

What?

...

What?

What's gonna burn?

... Your mom?

[He's so confused.]

My mom ain't here.

... Right.

I totally knew that.

Sure, sure. Totally believe that.

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