1st

[salamandher]

[The comm clicks on to a clipped, annoyed female voice. There are footsteps in the background, and her voice is echoing. She's on the move, but where exactly she's going is anyone's guess, at this point.]

Okay. I get it. Alternate universe, right? I tripped in the shower, fell into the refrigerator, accidentally summoned up a gateway to Cthulhu's penthouse suite. That's... usually the story.

What's the ritual or the quest to get out again? Barring that, where's the sacred whatsit I've got to pick up to open the door again?

[A pause.]

That's... assuming someone's around to actually hear this... and I'm not just talking to myself.

[There's a shaky inhalation.]

Jacob?

Comments

Audio

[ntjstapwn]

That's usually how it goes, but we've yet to figure out what the quest or task to escape is.

You're on the M.S. Elegante, and your comm connects you to ShipNET. Mostly you'll just talk to other passengers on it.

Audio

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

... Then you must not be trying very hard, huh.

Great. Who's this supposed to be?

Re: Audio

[ntjstapwn]

Redd just set the difficulty level too high.

I'm Marco. Another passenger here.

Audio

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

And that stops you from trying harder... how?

Nice.

Re: Audio

[ntjstapwn]

*He sighs*

We are trying. Some people have been trying for two years.

[voice]

[battle-droid.livejournal.com]

More of an intra-dimensional location that seems to defy time and space than an alternate universe.

[voice]

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

How... about we try that again? In English.

[voice]

[battle-droid.livejournal.com]

[She tries again.]

Consider it a plane between dimensions.

[voice]

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

There you go. See? Was that really so hard?

[l33tshushuhero.livejournal.com]

[So many new terms WHY.]

... what's a refrigerator? Oh, no, no, don't tell me! It's a portal, isn't it?

Ah, and if it's a quest you need accomplishing, madam, then I'm more than happy to lend my support!

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

... Yeah, it's a portal. To a magical land full of food.

[PAUSE.]

Speaking of which, how about a quest for some of that?

[l33tshushuhero.livejournal.com]

R-Really?! That's amazing! That's wonderful! And where do you find these refrigerators?

Some of what? Refrigerators?

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

In... kitchens. Are you serious?

No, some food.

[pimp-hat.livejournal.com]

How 'bout we just say all of da above and leave it at dat? Be makin' a lot more sense den da ansahs crew been feedin' us.

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

Great. When do I meet the tentacle monsters?

[pimp-hat.livejournal.com]

Haven't seen one 'round here but if I do I'll let jah know.

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

I guess that's comforting...

Who's this?

[a-doc-not-a.livejournal.com]

Hell, you might as well have fallen into the refrigerator for all we know.

[Sort of amusing image, though.]

Welcome to the M.S. Elegante.

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

You'd think there'd be a lot more mold, if I had.

[a-doc-not-a.livejournal.com]

[Ha! That was actually funny. Bones approves.]

There's a hell of a lot of useless things in this place. I'm sure you could find a nest of mold if you wanted to. Still can't find any damn medical tools, though.

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

I'm... really okay with never ever sticking my face into a nest of mold, thanks.

Medical tools? Like... tongue depressers and crap?

[autodidacticone.livejournal.com]

...you too?

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

Be more specific. Me too what?

[autodidacticone.livejournal.com]

You usually...accidentally trip into alternate dimensions?

I mean, I always sort of vaguely assumed I wasn't the only one, since empirically there's no reason why I should be, even if going by statistical analysis alone, but I've never met anyone who...

...well, that's a lie, but dead people don't count.

[salamandher.livejournal.com]

No. Once there was that thing with mushrooms. Shitake mushrooms, not the other kind.

Yeah, you know? Considering how many people answered this message? You're really not the only one.